So..I’ve been celibate for seven months and some change now, and while I’m not ready to pounce on the first thing with a peen between his legs, I didn’t realize just how long it’s been since I’ve even seen a man’s joystick until yesterday. I was at work, and one of my co-workers was saying that some guy inboxed her a unsolicited photo of his penis. She wasn’t impressed by him or the photo and after telling him that, she began showing a few other co-workers what he was (or wasn’t) working with. I just started working at this job, so I’m not one of the girls yet. Maybe she wasn’t sure if I would be into looking at that sort of thing, but she didn’t show me the pic. I didn’t feel left out, but the more I listened to them discuss the penis in question, the more I just had to see it. I could say that the reason I wanted to see it so bad is because my curiosity got the best of me and I wanted to laugh at the joke, too; but I haven’t touched or even looked at a peen (in person) in over seven months, so I was anxious to see it. First of all, I agree with her- he should have kept that thang (pun intended) to himself, because it was nothing to write home about, and the bad part was it appeared to be erect. I could definitely see what they were all giggling about. Fellas, just an F.Y.I.- dick pics are frowned upon, but if you must send a woman a pic of your tool, and it’s not bigger than a Snickers bar, she and her girlfriends WILL clown you.
Second of all, I think that the longer I go without gettin’ any, the more I’m losing my desire and interest in sex, altogether. I literally glanced at it for all of 2.5 seconds and went back to work. Maybe my reaction would have been different had he really been working with something…but then again, maybe not. Peen pics have never excited me- even if it is ten inches and attached to a sexy, chocolate man. I might look for about ten seconds, if that’s the case. That wasn’t the first time I’ve heard a woman say a man just sent her a photo of his penis, all wily nilly. Is this what the dating game has come to? I’m so not the woman to send a picture like this to, because I’m known for putting people on blast, especially if it’s the size of a Vlasic baby dill pickle. Guys, not many women get turned on by photos of your penis. Maybe I’m getting old, but a handsome face and impressive length just doesn’t do it for me anymore. Wait, let me rephrase that- a handsome face and impressive length are great qualities for a man to have, but there’s one thing I crave more than those two things- monogamy. Now there’s a word that seems to have gotten lost in the dating game sauce.
Do people even try to be faithful in relationships anymore these days? Give me a faithful man over a loser with a big piece of steel, any day. I was telling another co-worker who’s getting married this weekend that it’s been a minute since I’ve had some, and she looked at me as if I was crazy as she asked, “Why?” I didn’t go into the specifics of telling her exactly why I’m in no rush to have sex, because clearly nothing I would have said would have made sense to her. If I had chosen to answer, I would have told her that giving up my cookie to a man who treats me less than I want and deserve to be treated is no longer an option for me, no matter how much time goes by. I could probably benefit from getting my feet wet, but I’m holding out for someone who can offer me more than what’s between his legs…big or small. Meaningless sex is such a waste of my precious time. I am sexless and completely content.